Colony Intergrated

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Colony Intergrated

can someone please help me correct this? i also need to add at least three more sentences?


we are working on the yearbook, and the title is Linked as One; our mascot is the hornet this is what is sounds like:

A single hornet cannot survive alone in nature. Hornets must work as a unit, as a single entity, to ensure that the dominion which they meticulously rule is prosperous. Each and every hornet is vital to the colony. No role is significant; each one is a link in the interconnected chain that works to maintain the success of the colony. The Hornets of Pelham High School may not have realized it in the beginning, but they were all connected in one way or another. Every student, every teacher, every school organization, every member of the community was a relevant part of a whole that intergrated to make the school what it was: an institution to be proud of. Although all seniors must eventually become detached from the chain to continue on the trecherous road called life, the upcoming freshmen will be there to replace the missing links.

try changing the "they"s to "we"s; that way when people read it they feel connected. And change the past tense to present tense.



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